Have you ever thought back to your middle and high school days? Laughed at how emotional and judgmental you once were. Do you go through your old diaries and journals and read about your old relationships? Do you get wrapped back up into the anger, hurt, and brokenness you were feeling at that time?
A couple weeks ago, that was me. I was sitting in my bedroom floor reading through diaries I had kept from middle school and high school. They were obnoxious journals that any adolescent would pick out. Hot pink with fuzzy hair on it, weird I know.
As I was reading through this journal I began to sink back in to the younger version of myself. The girl I was before I accepted Christ and before I found my self in Him. I was reading about heartbreak, and lack of trust, and betrayal. I started feeling all of the same emotions that I had when I was writing it. As embarrassing as it may be, I began to cry looking back at how broken, lost and dependent I was on the world.
I cared about boys (didn’t we all) more than anything in this world. I allowed myself to be controlled by them. I felt popular if more than one boy liked me. I dressed myself in ways that I would be noticed. I was fully dependent on their attention. I was finding my purpose and my identity in them.
Now what is crazy to me is how I thought that was good enough. I believed that the boys of this world could give me a reason to live. And could give me my purpose. But man was I wrong. As I was siting on the floor reading through my diary I began to also flip through my bible and look up verses that counteracted all of these emotions that I was feeling and writing about.
The God of the universe has given us life. He has breathed in to our very being and He is the reason that we live. He is the reason that we wake in the morning. And in Him is where I find my identity.
"But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light." // 1 Peter 2:9
We are specifically chosen as adopted children in the Lords family. We have been chosen to carry out the gospel and tell as many people as possible about Jesus.
If we have been assigned such a great task, then why are we sitting around finding ourselves in boys?
We are loved by the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords! How could we ever want something more?
The Lord calls us His beloved. Be Loved. The state of being loved.
Have you ever thought about how powerful this statement is?
“As he also says in Hosea: "I will call those who were not my people, 'My people,' and I will call her who was unloved, 'My beloved.” // Romans 9:25
God calls people who are undeserving, broken, and messy his beloved. God calls people who are unloved and rejected His beloved. He gives people his love freely and doesn’t require you to fight for his attention and dress to impress. He loves you with an unceasing no hesitations love.
The definition of beloved is to mean someone who is esteemed, dear, favorite, and worthy of love. my beloved, with whom I am well pleased.
And this love God has for us, is like that of a father to a child, worthy of love, with whom he is well pleased. He calls us from a state of unloved to beloved. And the very name is a command. To be loved. To accept this love and let yourself be loved, by something greater than yourself. And that is a name he extends to both you and himself, as to be beloved is to enter a union with another of love.
Let go of your willingness to be loved and accepted by the world. Don’t be the same girl that I once was.
Allow yourself to be loved by God. Let go of what the world is defining as love and dive head first into the most romantic and intimate love story of all time. A relationship with a God who gives grace, mercy, and love. A relationship that you will never be alone in. A relationship where you can be deeply loved and fully known.
A relationship where you are known as beloved.
Abby // @abbystrahle