When there isn’t magic in the summer air there can be quite a bit of room for a little thing called self-pity.
Some define self-pity as “a self-indulgent dwelling on one’s own misfortunes”.
But I’d like to define it as this: When you’re not sure how to cope with the amount of Whole30 beach-bods, new summer romances and life-changing summer trips on your Instagram feed so you decide to live on your couch for the remainder of existence while binge watching Gossip Girl and eating a whole pack of Oreos again followed by intentionally spending even more time on Instagram so you can feel even worse about yourself and start the process all over again. Lather, wash, repeat.
Look, I get it. Even when life is great and school’s out for the summer it can be easy to blow-up the balloons and light the candles to our own pity party. However, the weight of self-pity is neither healthy nor godly, and the bible says so. It tells us that the root of self-pity is discontentment, and discontentment is ultimately rooted in mistrusting God.
So here you go… it only takes…
3 STEPS TO LOSE YOUR COOL THIS SUMMER FEAT. SELF PITY:
1. Try to get what you want when you want it. Let’s admit it. We’ve all been stuck in the smog of stress while studying for a big exam, and our natural instinct is to have Dominos delivered to our dorm to make us feel better. IT’S WHAT WE WANT. Our impulsiveness (and self pity) lead us to a life of temporarily pleasures and the same amount of stress waiting at the bottom of an empty pizza box. Though this may seem like a small and somewhat insignificant example of our impulsive desires, the truth is that when we have the mentality to go after what we want when we want it, we are also choosing to go against what God wants for us in His right time.
Philippians 4:19 says that, “My God will supply every need of your according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.” If you believe God can and will supply your every need, then he will 100% get you through long night of stressful studying — no Dominos required. Trust that he will get you through, and He will.
2. Spend all your time focusing on what other people have. The perfect hair, the flawless skin, the hottest boyfriend, the raddest Insta-brand… it’s all one vicious cycle that will definitely lead to you losing your cool this summer. Hebrews 13:5 says, “Keep your lives free from the love of money (or unattainable beauty or jealousy) and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”
Trusting God means that when He says, “I’ll never leave you” you actually believe it. He’s there on the couch-Dominos-and-Oreo days and He’s there on the days when you chose to step out of self-pity and live like a Daughter of the King. He wants you to find contentment in Him because He’s the only thing that will never fail you.
3. Don’t wait! Act now!
Sometimes our initial reaction to seeing others succeed is to be the overcompensating, “Act now” girl. We begin to panic and stress when we feel like we’re lagging behind in life’s race to success. Seeing others get married, get the dream job, and seemingly move forward in life can be hard when we feel stuck or aimless. It’s easy to get impatient and start working towards empty-success when we want to keep up with society’s checklist. But God asks us to do the opposite of our self-pitying and overcompensating nature.
He says, “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways… it is better to be godly and have little than to be evil and rich.” (Psalm 37:7,16) This tells us that all the riches of the world can never equate to the fullness that comes in being still in the Lord presence. God doesn’t want us wasting our time climbing a ladder to empty, unfulfilling success. He wants you to slow down and realize that He is not only waiting for you at the finish line but He is with you through the race.
When we decide to step out of our self-pity and into contentment in our weakness, it is there that God can demonstrate His strength to its fullest (2 Corinthians 7:17). Before entering the summer, decide to give God permission to show off His strength through you. Trusting God with your summer, no matter what it may look like, can be the first step to trusting God for a lifetime.
Caroline // @caroline_mitchell
My name is Caroline Mitchell, and I'm a recent graduate of Belmont University in Nashville, Tennessee. Some things you'll always find me doing are having bonfires with my friends, caring for my plant-babies, singing an unusual variety of music at the top of my lungs, and listening to the life stories of other people.Listening to the life stories of other people reminds me of the greatest lesson I learned in college: love the story God gave you. Most days it's easier to love someone else's story more than your own. But my hope is that through the Delight Blog you can learn more about Jesus through other women's stories so that you can begin to love the story God gave you!