How To Give Everything To The One Who Gave It All

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Let me preface, you do not need to be a lifelong Christian to surrender to Christ. I know many new and old Christians who have met and surrendered to Christ in about a billion different ways on endlessly different timelines. There is no five-step program to giving your life over to our savior because he meets each of us individually and we are all wonderfully and specifically made in our own unique ways.

I have been a Christian my entire life. I was baptized before the age of 1, raised in a Christian country and home, attended religion classes, went to church, and celebrated every single religious holiday for as long as I can remember. I love having grown up in immediate proximity of the Lord, but until I went into my freshman year of college I did not realize that I hadn’t surrendered my life to Christ.

I began a more intimate relationship with my savior around age 10, when I began to yearn for a deeper knowledge of Christ than “Jesus loves me this I know for the Bible tells me so.” I prayed and read my bible, sometimes not as frequently as a should have! I can say with complete confidence that I spent my life chasing the heart of the Lord. In high school, I started to really study my bible; I wanted to know what Christ meant, not just be able to quote what He had said. I remained rooted in my faith through a devastating family loss and continued to trust in the Lords plan and that it was good.

One of my favorite quotes is; “Those who leave everything in God’s hand, will eventually see God’s hand in everything,” and I was so convinced that I was doing exactly that. But the truth is I was not. I had created an image of myself as a someone who had given their life over to Jesus, and it was convincing enough that I believed it too.

However, as I was about to find out at my first year at university, I was holding on to such an enormous amount stuff in my metaphoric life backpack instead of laying it down at the feet of Jesus that I was physically stuck. Stuck in a relationship where I was breaking my own heart, stuck blaming myself for family conflicts, stuck in my insecurities. I was about as landlocked as Switzerland, and it was going to take a miracle of immense proportion to change my situation. Fortunately, our God is an expert in this department.

The Lord spent my freshman year spring cleaning the hoarder level house that was my heart. I don’t know about you, but I sometimes hold on to useless stuff because it reminds me of a fond memory. Well, I had done that with my emotions as well, and instead of giving them over to the Lord once those memories held more pain that joy I kept them locked away in my heart where they would pop up suddenly and hurt me all over again. I guess the Lord thought it was time to break my destructive cycle of holding onto my pain and pushing it down instead of letting it go. He forced me into a situation that I could not handle alone, a situation that made me feel like I was not good enough. And he taught me that it did not matter how good I was, because He is more that good enough and as long as I stay rooted in Him that is all that matters. He showed me His incredible ability to heal my pain, but that I had to hand over what was hurting me to be healed. It’s like being sick, if you don’t go to the doctor there is no way they can help you.

I once read that we all have a Jesus-sized hole in our hearts and when we fill it with other things it doesn’t quite fit right. Pulling out our placebo pieces hurts and we might bleed a little, but it is little in comparison to the incredible joy and peace we are capable of receiving once we fill that hole with Jesus Christ.

“I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now
live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”
// Galatians 2:20

So, let us give everything to Him because He gave everything to save us. Whether that be a boy you love but know God isn’t calling you to be with or it is guilt over not loving another person because you did not like them or it is something you have never even dared to think about, just hand it to the Lord because He already knows all about it and is just waiting to listen to you tell Him about it. He wants you to come to Him with your sorrows and worries, your fears and doubts, but also your joys and triumphs because He cares deeply for us. We are His children. He is always, without fail, no matter what, there for us. Surrender your life to Him because He surrendered His life to give you yours.

Kathy Steinberger // @kathysteinberger